Welcome! If you have found this site then you are on the right path to your recovery! My story is a little long, but it has all worked out for me in the end.

I had a child when I was really young, out of wedlock and the father left. My parents moved and left me and my child on our own. We did ok, but I guess when you are still a child yourself you still need guidance from your parents. Well I didn't have the right amount. This led to me having too much freedom and wanting to experiment. And boy did me ever!

I went out every weekend to bars, while I was still way under age, I dabbled in all kinds of drugs and just hung out with the wrong people. Before I knew it I was addicted to everything! I drank like a fish, I would be in high school doing rails off the back of toilet seats just to keep awake in class, I would do pill after pill of whatever was around just to numb the loneliness of being a single mother on her own and trying to hold the home together and get to high school.

I spiraled out of control! I started a job that I thought was so cool, because it was in bars which allowed me to party every night as well as get paid for it. This led to me selling drugs and using even more. It seemed like I was the girl to party with! Why? Well because I ALWAYS had the drugs and I ALWAYS partied hard! Therefore everyone wanted to be around me!

I came to realize though that these people were really not my friends. When I was "out" then so were my "friends". Anyway, I lived this lifestyle until I graduated high school and thought maybe I should give this up and start to plan my education and career.

So I took a break from drugs, for a week. Started university and was right back to what I did! I finished some university and then dropped out, it was way too hard to party and be that involved with school! So I went back to work managing and "running" a club. Now let me tell you, I made killer money... but had nothing but bad health to show for it! I lived this way for another few years and even went to college.

While in college I kept my night job so I could still party and soon found that I was pumping more and more cocaine, ecstasy, booze, and more in my system just to keep me going. I would get maybe 2 hours a sleep a night and then I would go to school, leave school go home take care of my child, get the sitter, eat something and then head for my night job.

I would get off my job at about 3 am and then go party till around 5 am, go home sleep and get up and do it all over again! I wore myself out in no time! I was being hounded by my family and real friends as they were fearful I would surely kill myself with this lifestyle. So then it happened! I got sick. My body wasn't going to let me do this to myself anymore and it retaliated! I wound up sick and miserable! I couldn't party at all. My body just wouldn't let me! So I tried quitting.

This did not work out too well for me! I would last a week or so and then my phone would ring and it was someone's birthday, some festival or holiday that required the need for partying! And again I would blow my short lived sobriety straight out of the water with the thought, "Just this last time, I'll quit tomorrow!" Tomorrow would always come and go… never actually sustaining ANY sobriety.

My habit though was to jump from one drug to the next, I would favor cocaine for a period of time and then it would make me sick so I would completely stop that drug and jump to another until that one made me sick etc. So I was on my ecstasy binge for a few months when I wound up back in the hospital. I was really sick.

So much so that I needed major surgeries and my family and medical team weren't sure I was going to make it. But through all of this I had developed a new addiction! I was now addicted to prescription meds! So here I was so proud of myself for kicking the habits I didn't even realize I spiraled into the "new addiction".

For over two years I enjoyed my doses of prescribed meds and would even convince my medical team that I was building tolerance and would require larger doses. This continued until doctors started to notice that the doses I took should have knocked out a 300 lb man for days! But I didn't exactly take them as prescribed. I realized that the effect of these meds were much better if I snorted them!

The best way I can describe the feeling of my life for two years, was like driving through a fog with all these black holes in it that stuff would just get lost in! My relationship with my friends, family and child just deteriorated! I was in major trouble! For a long time I just wouldn't accept that this new addiction was now in control! And it was! So I was finally convinced after another battery of medical tests that I needed to stop this new love I had!

The medical team had given me a shortened life span. So much so that my child wasn't even going to be an adult and I would surely die. This was not a stop using tactic, I knew this because my time in college was spent training in the medical field! I knew they were right. I knew I was killing myself. Who really wants to slowly and agonizingly kill them self?!

Not me. My child needed me. My child deserved so much more then what I was providing! So after awhile of worrying and wondering if I could do this I made the decision! I decided that I was going to check myself into a much needed treatment program! So I started my research. It took a month and a half for me to finally find what I was looking for.

I became so independent after all the time of being on my own that I knew I could not go into a program that would lock me up, make me miserable, and shelter the outside real world from me. I needed to see that life still went on, some people weren't going to change and that I could learn how to make the RIGHT decisions without having to hide from them! So the day came when I checked myself in.

I flew so far away from all my family, as in the past when the hospitals would try to detox me I would always leave and guilt my family into coming to get me! I needed to be away from all my enablers and face the addiction alone and head on!

I arrived after 8 hours of flight time. I was severely intoxicated and well over medicated. The councilors and staff here were amazing! They helped me kick this thing. I mean, I did most of the work, because in my opinion it really depends on you whether or not you want to stop, if you do you will.

I spent a month at the treatment center, which was NOT a lock down center. We went out in the real world supervised of course! We had real life lessons! Not nonsense psycho babble. We understood we had a problem and needed to fix it. So we did! My family and I are so proud of me! Finally I did the right thing! I found sobriety! Don't get me wrong I still have some bad days, but I'm out of the fog, I see clearly and rationally. I made it!

Thank you for listening, I hope this helps you realize that there are people out there who seemed to be doomed to a life of using. If I could turn my life around, I know anyone who is determined enough will too!

I arrived in southern California nearly 2 yrs. to the day and it's been a helluva ride! I came from the Detroit area where it's cold and depressing not to mention the temptation to travel into the concrete jungle where one can find himself in hooker heaven and drugs on every corner 24/7…

After arriving in So Cal I was quickly taken in by the warm sun, blue skies, palm trees, and beautiful people everywhere I looked! I started out attending an "Early Bird AA Meeting" every day (sometimes two meetings a day), and met several individuals who were either surfers or millionaires spending allot of time on the golf course or out at Catalina Island on their yachts. None the less they all shared the same dream that was soon to become a reality for me. As the months passed on--and quick they did--I went through several different jobs.

During my recovery I developed an urge, almost a need to help others get through the same experiences as I have, letting them know that if I could get through this and welcome sobriety, then so could anyone. I went to school knowing I needed to help people and that's what I wanted to do with my life. Before I knew it I was studying to be a drug and alcohol counselor. Today I am happily and successfully employed as a counselor, helping other people when they entered treatment.

Encouraging recovering addicts through detox and then aiding in the education on how to continue sobriety is the work I enjoy. This fall I'll be attending weekend classes to earn my certificate through the state of Michigan, allowing me to be a counselor. I have been happier than I ever thought I could be sober!

By the Book Luxury Sober Living Homes is a structured 12 step based program. We have two locations, San Diego State( by the college) and La Jolla. The San Diego State home has a pool, jacuzzi, pool table, pingpong table and is only a short walk to trolley and buss. The La Jolla home is blocks from the beach, shopping, resturantants, jobs and MEETINGS.

Our Program By The Book Sober Living provides a clean, safe, and structured home environment. Our purpose is to help the members of our community transition back into society and maintain lasting sobriety. Our house is centered upon the 12 steps of A.A. The disease of alcoholism is cunning, baffling, and powerful. We believe that by anchoring our day with a morning meeting we are taking action in our sobriety. We offer these morning meditation meetings to build spirituality and camaraderie.

Our Big Book meetings inform the community about the disease of alcoholism and how to find a life based on spiritual principles. We read the book and discuss our experience. This program is designed to help new residents be a part of the program. Rather than telling our residents to simply get a meeting slip signed, we join two AA meetings per week as a group. This extra support allows newcomers to feel more comfortable as we encourage them to exchange phone numbers with people they relate to during the sharing. Attending five meetings per week is mandatory.

The open men's big book study at the house has been a great way for newcomers to find sponsors. Finding a sponsor within the first thirty days is required. Residents work their program with the sponsor of their choice. When a new member joins our community he will meet guys that are working a spiritual program, rather than people who are isolated and DRY.

We have two homes. One is located in La Jolla/ Birdrock where residents do not need a car to survive and can walk to everything: food, shopping, jobs and beach. It is close to great surfing, scuba and kayaking. The other home is located near San Diego State University. Amenities include a pool, Jacuzzi, basketball courts, BBQ. Minutes to trolley and bus!

We are looking for people that are serious about finding a new way of life. This means taking suggestions and WORK. We are here to support individuals who are willing to WORK a strong recovery program. Graduating from our community, our brothers are prepared with the life skills, habits and discipline for lasting recovery.

Having relapsed several times over the past I0 years, I can honestly say the phenomenon of relapse still baffles me.

What I do know is what I have seen & heard. The value of attending meetings & staying close to the fellowship becomes even more apparent when we have a member who has had some years of sobriety come back identifying again as a newcomer.

What happened? From my own experience and listening to other members who have also relapsed, the common denominator seems to be complacency.

I myself stopped going to meetings, I didn't get a sponsor or stopped calling her, I cut back on reading my Big Book, I lost touch with the fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous and most of all I stopped prayer & contact with God.

This is the same story I hear again & again from other members who have also relapsed.

In other words we took charge of our lives one more time and thought we could do life without the program and the fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous. We lost our conscious contact with our Higher Power. We forget that the Big Book tells us we have a daily reprieve contingent on our Spiritual Maintenance. We forgot that our disease is cunning, baffling & powerful.

So the odds are if I continue to seek God on a daily basis, continue to be of service to my fellow Alcoholics, work the Steps & Program, attend meetings regularly, get a Sponsor & take direction, I will stay sober one day at a time. For the last 3 years 4mo & 11 days I have been sober only because I remember complacency does not work for me.

It is my experience that the phenomenon of relapse occurs long before we take that first drink.